1966 230 SL

1966 230 SL 

He said: "I remember that car, it was the same color as your lipstick." 

She said: "How do you remember the color of my lipstick? You should have paid more attention to the car. The car I still have, the lipstick has been discontinued. Nothing of me is an original.

I am the combined effort of everyone & anyone, I've ever known."

― LRAEBROWN

© 2013

EVOLVED

EVOLVED  

This year has been something to remember. For me, it was my year of evolving emotionally and letting go of past love and relationships, in all forms. I broke down so many doors I had been so fearful to enter for many decades, that were very close to my heart. I will say this, it was painful for the most part. A silent pain, but I needed to go through it. They say God brings people into your life to teach you. God will keep bringing different people into your life, until the right one is your true teacher. I believe that now. More so than ever. 

I've allowed myself to let go of several barrier that didn't allow me to receive love, appreciation from others and reciprocation of love and friendship from others. I never realized how tightly closed-in I was with my emotions and my heart. How much I was hungry for love, in all forms. When you get use to living and feeling a certain way for decades, bad or good, it becomes you. You might think it's a survival skill or just protecting yourself, but in reality it all boils down to, not allowing yourself to be truly loved by others. We all need to feel loved. Loneliness is not prejudice. Overall, the walls that has came crashing down around my view of life, love and relationships, has been enlightening, refreshing and overdue. I look forward to this coming year. No, I’m really excited for this coming year. To me it symbolize a new beginning. I've always appreciated New Years celebration. It has always symbolize a whole new life. A do-over. And since I didn't really get to do that in 2013; because the year was about learning lessons in love, relationships, going through several heartaches and lost. I’m positive, with full enthusiasm, I can fully look forward to 2014. 

I don’t know what’s coming, but I know this, it’s going to be really good and I have an abundant amount of gratitude, with an optimistic view of the coming year, like I’ve never had before. I’m excited! I hope you'll join me in this journey. I look forward to being with you next year. Raise your glass baby, to 2014. 

― LRAEBROWN

© 2013

Protect My Children

Protect My Children
from any harm, evil or pain,
in their journey of life.
I will protect you
from any man or woman
that will try to hurt you
or get in your way.
I will stand between
anyone who tries
to cause you pain.
Even if that person is me.
I will be your Joan of Arc,
your Queen Gorgo,
by your side.
I will be your soldier.
I will be your Queen,
now and forever in time.

― LRAEBROWN, HEART ON FIRE by L Rae Brown
© 2013

What a wonderful world...

I finally remembered, 
the song that was playing
on 4 violins, as I walk down the isle, 
of Saint Michael's Catholic Church, 
on the North side of Chicago, 
a beautiful day in the spring of 2000.

Our family and friends watched with love
in their heart. I can smell the starch
on my father's Marine Corps uniform.
The sound of his sword rubbing against his coat
and his white glove holding my hand,
as he walks me down the isle.

White dress with a 12 feet train, to boot.
Red roses was the smell of my bouquet.
A man in a tuxedo, waiting for me
at the top of the throne.
I couldn't keep my eyes off of him.
All my favorite poems
was written on his face.
I saw the tears flowing down his cheeks,
the smile in his eyes said it all.

With the violins echoing in this huge cathedral,
I think to myself,
What a wonderful world...

― LRAEBROWN
© 2013

On watching the movie, Meet Joe Black

Just finished watching one of my favorite all time movie, Meet Joe Black. 

I can't tell you exactly why, but there's something about a movie that speaks in volumes, when Death's human experience in love and gratitude, is the main objective of the movie (never-mind that it's played by Brad Pitt). One of the main characters, played by Anthony Hopkins, is a character I so admire, that every time I watch this movie, my only fantasy, is to grow old, to be the female version of the character of the man he plays. It always gives me that kick in my soul. 

One of my favorite line in the movie; "don't blow smoke up my ass, you'll ruin my autopsy."

I've never been the type of woman that really enjoyed chick flicks, unless I'm PMSing. 

I gear towards movies that has meat, content, volume, the stories that shows us the greatness and failures of being humans. Scars and all. Movies like Shawshank Redemption, The Usual Suspects, David, Bagger Vance, and the Red Violin.

My list of movies are very dynamic, their not simple to take in with just one viewing, or easy to except, and they're not the normal of what most women my age would gravitate towards. Then again, I’m not most women. If there was such a thing as past lives, I know I must have been a boy, a man, an old man, a million times over. I like my movies with many edges, plots, mystery, sometimes an abundant amount of guns and things that goes bang, all wrapped into a beautiful poem. Oh, and I don’t compromise. 

When I write poems, when I write the words, the stories in my novel is not about romance or simple human existence. My poems & stories linger in my mind, in my soul, till I know it will haunt you, like it haunts me, in a sweetest way. With the same familiar essence of the stories, movies, I tend to gravitate towards, repeatedly.

My desire has always been to write novels, in the same genre of movies that lingers in my heart and your heart, for eternity. 

-LRAEBROWN

OTHER PEOPLE'S PAIN

OTHER PEOPLE'S PAIN (Poem)

"I once witness a man, 

play these heartless games

with some poor girl.

She was crazy about him.

I've witness the other women react to him.

I've witness him play these games a thousand times before.

He had this poor girl 

wrapped around his fingers.

When he blinked, 

there she jumped.

When he appeared, 

her light comes on,

like a robot.

I knew she was another weak one.

His perfect victim.

What I knew deep in my heart,

eventually, she was going to be

devastated and broken hearted.

I couldn't be dragged into 

such a selfish game. 

I refuse to play any games, with a man.

I refuse to play a game 

that cause other people pain. 

I’ve witnessed a man, 

so callous with other people's heart.

I didn't want any part of that.

I have too much self respect,

and love for others,

to lower myself to such disgrace.

I don't want to be the cause,

of anyone's pain.

That's not the shape of my heart.

He wanted to see 

if our past life still existed.

He said, he was crazy about me 

& wanted a second chance. 

But I knew, 

something is deeply broken in him. 

It's not my place to glue the pieces. 

Words are just words. 

Even when they rhyme. 

It's the actions, 

the values,

the integrity of a good man, 

that's worth a billion. 

It's the values a woman holds 

close to her heart, 

that will attract that type of man." 

Karma can be kind or mean. 

I choose to treat her as my Queen.

― LRAEBROWN

© 2013